Parenting

Trauma Bonding: The Mistakes Parents Are Making

Trauma Bonding: The Mistakes Parents Are Making

Do you end up yelling at your kiddo to feel heard? We’ve all done it because…well, it works! It gets the cooperation in the moment but long term, it's not effective for the relationship.

If you’ve never heard of “Trauma Bonding,” you’re not alone.

…but if you’ve got a strong-willed child, more than likely, trauma bonding should be on your radar!

Tattling or Telling: How To Explain The Difference

Tattling or Telling: How To Explain The Difference

Motherhood is full of challenges every single day. There are a thousand decisions that she will make on the fly. And then she will lay in bed at night and think about the choices she made, wondering if she made the right choice..

Frequently, mom guilt comes into play because she makes a decision

#6 Simple Rules for Raising Respectful Communicators

#6 Simple Rules for Raising Respectful Communicators

Have you ever been called out on the carpet by one of your kids for doing something wrong? Maybe it wasn't even something that you thought was wrong - or perhaps you knew it was wrong - but, for whatever reason, your child thinks it is wrong and calls you out on it? Ouch!

Discover how easy it is to raise a respectful child with these 6 simple rules of communication.

The No Good Bad Word

The No Good Bad Word

Do you know what the no-good bad word is that we tend to always say as moms and should never say? It's the word "punishment." Are you using the word "punishment" when the kids do something wrong or don't listen?

If you find yourself saying, "You're going to be punished for that," let me tell you a little story:

When I was a kid growing up

Parenting Stress Provides Surprising Opportunities

Parenting Stress Provides Surprising Opportunities

The headlines online and in the newsstands continue to report on the spread of Coronavirus. Public facilities are stepping up their protocol to keep everyone safe and well. But it’s easy to see many are beginning to panic as they consider the “what-ifs.” In these times, it is valuable to have a plan B for our families in a world of uncertainty.

While authorities work diligently to…

The Truth About Mom Guilt

The Truth About Mom Guilt

I WATCHED WITH AMAZEMENT as that little pregnancy stick revealed a positive in the indicator window. I was going to be a mama, and I was so excited. During the nine months that followed, I did everything possible to make sure I would be the best mom ever.

I read all the books, did all the research, took all the vitamins, and ate all the right foods. I did everything required to be an amazing mom. And when the baby came, he was perfect. I thought life would be so perfect. I was ready to be the ideal mom.

The Inside Scoop On Parenting Through The Teen Years

The Inside Scoop On Parenting Through The Teen Years

YOU LOVE YOUR FAMILY, and you're dedicated. But you also know that parenting a teen or tweenager is hard work.

Everybody says the attitude is normal, just deal with it. But how do you get through the day-to-day of parenting? How do you keep things from escalating? How do you maintain your cool in the moment?

How to Prepare Strong-Willed Kids For The New School Year

THE SUMMER MOOD HAS SAILED and September rushes in its autumn vibe. School assignments and work schedules now compete for everyone’s attention. Mother and child both scramble to acclimate to a quicker tempo.

Chaotic emotions often characterize this academic month with its new opportunities and higher expectations. A pleasant state of mind may seem unsustainable with all the busyness, but the wise mother will always find a way. 

Read more here

Excerpt taken from ‘Mother Matters’ article first published in the Montclair Local News, written by Parenting Coach & Columnist, Loyla Louvis, AACC.

Rescue Kids From Summer Boredom

Rescue Kids From Summer Boredom

A MIDSUMMER’S DAY and Mom is tired. The kids have tons of energy and want something to do, something they haven’t done before.

The only vacation scheduled for this season is still weeks away. If Mom doesn’t come up with something exciting soon, boredom will set in.

We all know what happens when kids have nothing to do. They annoy each other. Or worse yet, one may settle for simply annoying YOU!

How To Speak So Your Child Feels Secure

THE ROUGHEST WAVES OF OCEAN FARE are no threat for the ship secured by an anchor. Properly employed, this steely hunk of crafted metal delves speedily through an underwater world of plant life and sea creatures to find its destination. In order to stabilize its craft above, it wedges uncompromisingly into a seabed of mud and clay.

Anchors, however, have another application that only the wise will understand and employ:

not all anchors are made of metal, and not all storms brew at sea.

In the turbulence of busyness and personal agendas, it may not take much for a mother to communicate with her child in such a way that weighty messages are cast over the threshold of her lips, anchoring themselves in the depths of her little one’s heart.

Read more here.

Excerpt taken from ‘Mother Matters’ article first published in the Montclair Local News, written by Parenting Coach & Columnist, Loyla Louvis, AACC.


Super Nap And Sleep Time Tips For New Moms

Super Nap And Sleep Time Tips For New Moms

Let's talk about nap and sleep training. This delightful part of the day is a life saver for every mom's schedule. Encouraging a period of rest doesn't even require a little one to be sleepy! The downtime is beneficial physically and emotionally for the entire family when it is routine and predictable.

Children aren't born with an internal clock that matches the world around them. Therefore, it's a mother’s saving grace to get everyone sleeping or resting on the same schedule…


Parenting Hacks & Tips For A Stay-At-Home Summer

A GENTLE BREEZE ACCOMPANIES WARM RAYS of sunshine as the school year comes to a close. Excitement builds as winter clothes are packed away and plans for school graduation now take center stage. Children eagerly anticipate the summer months and wonder what adventures lie ahead.

For the busy mother whose to-do list is endless, little will change as the academic year concludes. The demands upon her time and energy are not regulated by seasons or the school calendar. Summer break may not hold the same level of excitement as it does for little ones. The mental creativity required to bring satisfaction to an expectant child may feel daunting for a weary mom!

Read more here.

Excerpt taken from ‘Mother Matters’ article first published in the Montclair Local News, written by Parenting Coach & Columnist, Loyla Louvis, AACC.



A Positive Attitude Reveals Golden Opportunities For Mom

A Positive Attitude Reveals Golden Opportunities For Mom

THE IRONY OF MOTHERHOOD is that while Momma is busy raising her child with the hope of cultivating maturity, the child is simultaneously causing her to evolve as a human being. The conflicts in family life promote growth in parent and child alike.

These same challenges, unfortunately, hold an added level of complexity for Mom…

Teach Kids The Right Way To Apologize

Teach Kids The Right Way To Apologize

THE TRICKY THING ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS is that we often hurt the ones we love. The problem is that humanity is a bit broken, and that means we have sharp edges.  History has proven we don’t get through life without, unfortunately, offending others unintentionally or otherwise.  The closer our contact, the more painful the experience as jagged edges of brokenness scratch and poke at the soft pink underbellies of those we cherish.  

It’s like trying to hug a porcupine.  Think of all those pointy quills! But if porcupines can reproduce without killing each other or swearing off mating season, we can certainly learn how to navigate the sharp-edged brokenness associated with the human condition.  Regardless of the dangers, we were created for connection.  Our families won’t thrive without it.

Love and Divorce

Love and Divorce

WHEN THE STINGING THREAT OF DIVORCE becomes a harsh reality, the sacred terrain of marriage can freeze over into an icy battleground of pain and confusion.

Everything dedicated, worked for and believed in stares back with little to no recognition. Untold truths spill out, stripping away every illusion and expose an ugliness which cannot be unseen. The torrent of emotions which deluge mind and soul can sometimes feel like suffocation.

For the child who must cope with this crisis, divorce is worse than death. When goodbyes are said at the grave, he or she lives with the memory of someone who can no longer engage in the physical realm of our lives. But in the crossfires of divorce, while mom and dad are saying farewell to matrimony, the child’s greatest need is to…

Embracing a New Parenting Chapter

Embracing a New Parenting Chapter

Sparkling champagne, songs of celebration, and the crystal-laden globe of New Year’s Eve festivities usher in a fresh year filled with hope and dreams. A clean, white slate invites each of us to author a new chapter in our parenting story where wrongs are made right, chaos is conquered, and life’s challenges feel a bit more surmountable.

The past serves as a brilliant teacher, enlightening us with new insights regarding old attitudes, mindsets, and perspectives. The desire to avoid repeating the mistakes of yesterday is a legitimate reason to pause and reflect, motivated by the resolve to do better in the days to come.

As you take a deep, cleansing breath and courageously script the next chapter of motherhood, determine to make this one a high point in the parenting journey. With the heartfelt longing of any mother to improve relationships and build stronger bonds, let’s consider ways in which you might step out of yesteryear and seize the opportunities which exist in the year ahead: