Every phase of parenting brings its own set of challenges and surprises, and these may differ hugely from one family to the next. What works for some parents to meet these challenges might not be a viable solution for others.
Still, there are some parenting principles that remain the same, no matter what your family’s circumstances are and at any stage of the game. You can check our ebook The Parenting Roadmap: A Guide For the Journey to help avoid potholes on the bumpy road of motherhood.
Understanding these principles will help you set your children up to grow into happy, responsible, and resilient adults. That’s why Mothers In Training has put together the following tips and resources.
Set a good example for your children.
Telling your children “Do as I say, not as I do” tends not to work very well — kids see right through it. If you want your children to make good and healthy choices, you need to model those choices for them.
Don’t just tell your kids to take care of their physical health — show them how to do it by eating nutritious meals, exercising regularly, and avoiding unhealthy physical habits yourself.
Demonstrate to your children how to live out healthy, affectionate relationships. Model for them how to practice empathy, and how to set boundaries while respecting those of others.
Show your children the importance of achieving your goals as a component of self-care by pursuing your dreams of business education or career betterment with continued training or even an online degree.
You should be willing to admit when you were wrong and give an apology to anyone you harmed or misjudged. This includes your children.
Always be present for your children.
From the very beginning, when they are tiny babies, your children need you to be present for them. What this means or how it looks may change as they grow and develop, but the need for your presence and care never goes away.
Practice active listening. This means you put aside other things you are working on and truly engage with your child, taking as much time as you need to make it clear that you want to understand what they are sharing.
Be involved in your child’s life. Assist them with homework, help them pursue their interests, and encourage an active, healthy social life.
Make your affection and love for your child clear with both words of affirmation and acts of care and support. It’s not enough simply to tell your child you love them — you need to demonstrate it in action.
Be clear and consistent with your children.
Sending mixed messages to your children can do a lot of harm. Lack of consistency leaves even very small children confused and unsure of whether they can depend on you.
Always communicate clearly with your children what is expected of them.
Keep your family rules and guidelines consistent. If you are constantly changing your rules from one day to the next, your child will have difficulty understanding your expectations and how they ought to behave.
Don’t practice double standards. If you have established clear guidelines on behavior and ethics, these guidelines should apply to everyone, not just them.
Be true to your word. Failure to enforce your rules or follow through on your promises will lead your child not to trust you.
You want to be the best possible parent for your children, whatever their age or needs. This means taking time to understand them, and even seeking professional support on occasion.
It also means working to understand yourself. These basic principles of good parenting will help you no matter what your unique parenting situation may be.
Our guest writer:
Anya Willis is a mother of three and has been a yoga instructor for the past 12 years. For most of her childhood, Anya struggled with her weight. In school, she was bullied because of it, and it wasn’t until she took a yoga class in college that things started to change. She fell in love with how yoga used her whole body and mind. For Anya this was the catalyst she needed, she found a new interest in her physical health and started striving for a healthier life. Reflecting on her younger years, Anya became passionate about kids being active and healthy.
Mothers In Training founder, Loyla Louvis, is a wife, a mother to a couple of strong-willed sons and a daughter, a Certified Life and Parenting Coach from the American Association of Christian Counselors, a public speaker, a homeschooling mom, and a teacher to home-schooled children in the tri-state area for over 19 years. Reach out today to see how she can help you!
