A gentle breeze accompanies warm rays of sunshine as the school year comes to a close. Excitement builds as school graduations announce summer vacation is ahead!

Assuming the kids will behave and everything works out, you only have to deal with the stress of organizing vacation plans so that summer is a big hit for everyone. 

For example, I've been hearing rumors that it's challenging to get a rental car while traveling abroad.

I don't know if you ever watched the show Seinfeld, but there's an episode where they rent a car, and yet the car isn't there when Seinfeld shows up. Jerry Seinfeld screams, "it's not the reservation we're reserving, it's.... hold the CAR!" So there was a whole episode around vacation drama and all that can go wrong.

And then there's the 12-hour flight to the exotic destination. Of course, the kids might have a meltdown while everyone is shoulder to shoulder for a 12-hour flight. But then, that's only the start of things getting messy!

I guess you could just hand out - like every 15 minutes - little trinkets. That might work... for a while.

And now they have iPads. So the kiddos might just be on their iPads the entire flight. Or you could try the red-eye flight hoping the kids will be so tired they'll sleep on the plane.

No doubt, they might be cranky once they're home, but hey, at least the flight will be a quiet one, and your fellow passengers will silently bless you for your genius plan. But the truth is, it's all exhausting - the whole vacation planning thing. 

Isn't vacation supposed to be relaxing for everyone?

So let's get right to the heart of the matter: Kids are not going to keep in mind all the trouble you went through to plan a vacation, and they’re not thinking how grateful they should be for all your effort. You know, they're not going to have this perspective because they're young, so they're just going about life in real-time. 

That's the difference. Kids are in real-time. There is no past. There is no future. There is only the ever-present now. So that means, when they're tired, they're tired, no matter what you plan or what you expect. And they're going to act tired, hungry, etc. So they're always going to be thinking, doing, saying things they feel right in the moment. 

The point:  Less really is more. Do one thing in the morning and one thing in the late afternoon, max! That would probably be your best-case scenario. Anything other than that is too much stimulation and is going to put them into a hyperdrive. 

When kids are in hyperdrive, they're terrible. They're just awful, and it's not their fault. There's just too much stimulation, especially in light of the fact they're already in a brand new environment. They're already excited by the whole new adventure. More importantly, they're off their typical schedules.

So you have to really dial everything down so kiddos can embrace what's happening and take it all in. Then, afterward, let everybody have time to decompress and chill and do the usual things that happen in a day. 

So, the typical vacation planning mistake looks like this: Mom and Dad bend over backward to make all these grand plans. Then, finally, the kids get to the new destination, and all they want to do is watch TV and play on their iPad.

So, you can expect things to play out that way. But yet, that's really frustrating, especially when you've gone to such great lengths to do something really nice for the family.

So you have to keep in mind that part of having a good experience and family bonding is to keep in mind the great possibility that they're just going to want to watch TV and play or sit by the pool and play with their toys.

They may even WANT to see the thing you lined up for them, but they may be bored of it within 15 minutes. The reality is that kids can't really comprehend what you've really done for them. Their little brains are just too underdeveloped and immature to go there just yet.

So, if the goal of your summer vacation is to bond and make good memories, right? But if you're there saying, "We just got here, and I paid all this money. We're going to have a good time, dammit!" you're going to ruin it. Right? 

So keep things chill. Keep it ever so laid back, you know, especially for a 6-10 yr. old who may only remember one or two moments of your trip. For a 3-5 yr. old, they may not even recall the vacation at all by the time they're a teenager.

Planning ahead is the key to a successful family vacation. If you’ve got some tips and tricks that could help other parents, or want to share your experience planning for this year’s trip with kids in tow, please email me!

I can't wait to hear from you about your story. Happy travels!

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