Mothers In Training: Parent Coaching

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Parenting Stress Provides Surprising Opportunities

The headlines online and in the newsstands continue to report on the spread of Coronavirus. Public facilities are stepping up their protocol to keep everyone safe and well. But it’s easy to see many are beginning to panic as they consider the “what-ifs.” In these times, it is valuable to have a plan B for our families in a world of uncertainty.

While authorities work diligently to find a remedy, you and I have an excellent opportunity to teach our kids concepts they might otherwise ignore. Their own curiosity about what they see and hear in the news is the perfect time to drive home valuable life lessons.  

With our children in view, let us consider how to navigate through these challenging times:

  • Don’t lie to kids. We don’t need to lie to children about what is going on, but we don’t need to scare them either. We can give them information according to their age and emotional coping abilities. For a young child, one might say, “The Coronavirus is like a bad cold and easy to catch. Doctors are working on a treatment. But while we wait, there is much we can do to stay well.” The opportunity here is that we can connect with our children in reality. We can walk through difficult times together without feeling we have to create an alternative reality for them.

  • Don’t panic. Kids are natural-born scientists. They are reading our facial expressions, body language, and tone of voice to learn how safe their world is for them. If we are panicked, they will feel it. A sensitive child may hear stories on television and be convinced he or she will end up a victim with a similar outcome. You have their full attention at times like this and can teach them how to quell fear and anxiety as you model it for them. Practice positive thinking, deep breathing, thought monitoring, and covering your family in prayer if you are a praying mom. These are just a few ways to reduce and/or eliminate panic.

  • Do practice good hygiene. This is a great time to teach our children how to practice good hygiene. Kids now have the motivation they need to wash hands, use hand sanitizers, cough, and sneeze into their arm, shoulder, or in the collar of their shirt. The good news is that we have a fantastic window of opportunity now to work on family hygiene, which always seems to be a chronic source of stress in the typical household. The opportunity here is that you can build upon the community’s message to use proper hygiene.

  • Do eat healthy. Food is medicine. We don’t put bad gas in a car and expect it to run well. Food eaten is like gasoline in the engine. The nutrients our bodies need to have a strong immunity also comes from the foods we eat. A child can learn all the ways their meals help their body stay healthy as you provide proper nutrition in the home. In essence, we teach our children we are not powerless in our circumstances. Even food offers a solution. There is always something we can do!

  • Plan out a home routine. If you have to stay home from work because the school has closed for a significant time, bring purpose and structure into the day. This might consist of some time at the computer for online learning, creative time for art, physical activity for exercise, and some carefree downtime. When you add in prepping meals together and cleaning up, conversations, connection time, and sleep, you have the makings of a full day’s routine. The opportunity here is that you can create purpose and structure that provides a seamless flow to the days in which getting to school is not an option. 

  • Prepare your caregivers. If you are a working mother and can’t work from home, caregivers are a natural stand-in. Make sure they know your values and desires for the day and that they keep your child on a routine. Without your guidance and instruction, a caregiver does not instinctively know your habits, values, and priorities. They don’t know your child’s strengths and struggles and may only try to get through the day without anyone getting hurt. You can create consistency and routine in your household while you are at work by educating and instructing your caregiver. This is an opportunity to delegate strategically for the benefit of everyone involved in your child’s life.

    The bottom line is that consistency, creativity, and confidence are the ingredients that help us get through challenges. The Coronavirus is in the headlines today, but tomorrow it will be something else. The reality is that life will always throw challenges our way. Having a plan that promotes psychological stability and emotional regulation works for the family in all circumstances and leads to more peace in the parenting journey… and isn’t that what we all want more of at the end of the day? 

    May you stay well in the days ahead as you navigate your parenting journey. If you would like to dive deeper into creating a calm, confident household, don’t hesitate to reach out. I’m here to empower you!